Confession 6: I have much to be thankful for

Many of you will be celebrating Thanksgiving this week. Which means you’ll be headed home to visit with family. You’ll be another year older and another year single when you do so. Which means that you can rest assured some family member will say something quite stupid to you. In light of this I offer the following short list of things to keep in mind.

1. A ready response

I find that often times I have no ready response to crazy questions about my being single. I was once at a missions luncheon and a pastor’s wife asked me, “Who are you here with?” Meaning, which one is your husband because clearly you couldn’t be the minister yourself (she may not have meant it this way, but I can’t say for sure). But, I responded with, “Oh, just myself.” Really, that was my answer. I’m here with myself? What does that mean?

Another time following something I shared in a meeting I was asked this question, “Did I hear you say that ‘you guys’ were in missions?” To which my brilliant response was, “No, it’s just me – I’m just one person.” Seriously, aren’t we all just one person? Did that need to be stated? These are the stupid things I say when caught off guard. So come up with your answer to, “Are you seeing someone?” or “Still single this year?” or “Did you acquire any cats this year?” prior to arrival at your aunts house.

2. Some people are just stupid

Most people ask you questions with your best interest at heart. They’ve been married forever and are happy and they want the same for you. Many don’t realize that happiness comes in all sorts of ways – in pairs and in singles – so they can’t understand how you could be happy in a way that is opposite from themselves. Down deep inside your grandma (or whoever) loves you and that’s what prompts them to ask, at inappropriate times I might add, about your dating life or lack thereof. So for these loved ones remember that there are only a few holidays a year, have your ready response on the tip of your tongue, and just be thankful that people love you and care about you. But, there are some people who just don’t have a clue nor do they understand the pain that holidays or questions about your single state bring to you. And for those people the correct response to “why are you still single” is “I don’t know why are you still stupid?”

3. A pre-written note to parents

Dear Mom and Dad: We live in America. The year is 2011. Why are you still trying to arrange a marriage for me? Leave me alone. Sincerely, Your Loving Son/Daughter.

I would like to point out that I have incredible parents who raised me to be independent and go for my dreams. They do not pester, question, nag, or ask about my singleness. I am beyond grateful for parents who love me for me and are happy for me and the life I live. Apparently, though, this is not typical. I’ve discovered over the years that most parents of single adults are pushy beyond reason. I know this because I keep meeting those people’s parents. “I have a son about your age.” Good to know.

4. You have a lot to be thankful for

Single or married, currently dating or not since the Bush administration, there are reasons to be thankful. I personally am thankful that as I’ve quoted before, “The Lord sits the lonely into families.” I’m thankful for those families that have taken me in to their homes and in to their lives. I’m thankful for friends – both single and married and married with children – that make my life rich and full. I’m thankful for my family – a mom and a dad and a sister – who support me and encourage me. I’m thankful for a Saviour who became Immanuel and who died for individuals. I’m thankful that He has a plan for my life – a plan for me (since I’m just one person!). That plan may or may not include a spouse, but it does include love. The love of a Saviour extended to me day after day.

I am blessed and I am thankful and I hope that you are too. Happy Thanksgiving!

Note: My sarcastic nature was at an all time high when writing this one so keep that in mind.

My apologies to my cat loving friends and owners no offense was intended.